Weekday Mornings 5am-9am
Talk about your Mars/Venus. In a recent survey, it was discovered that women were most likely to:
1. Hit a parked car
2. Back into another car
3. Get into an accident in a parking lot
4. Crash while pulling out a parking spot onto a road
5. Crash on a side street
So, I'm just asking if this could be because you ladies could be mildly inattentive, primping or applying makeup while you should be paying better attention to to the task at hand. But, again, this is pretty minor stuff.
As for the guys, when it comes to highway mishaps, WE GO BIG! Get this. The Big 5 accidents on our side:
1. Hit a pedestrian
2. Have a head-on collision
3. Have a multi-car accident
4. hit a guard rail
5. Drive off the road and DOWN AN EMBANKMENT!
So, it looks that while the girls are playing fairly innocuous bumper cars, the boys are causing massive damage with extensive loss of life and limb. WE ARE LUNATICS. So, here's what we do. You guys get the car onto the street and then as you approach the freeway onramp, hand the keys to your woman.
It's obvious. We guys can't be trusted over 30 (mph). (photo from mytvmoments.com)
Get this. This Catholic school in New Jersey is taking a lot of heat for asking its female students to "act more like ladies" by making a pledge to NOT CURSE for 30 days. But here's the kicker. MALE students at Queen of Peace High School in North Arlington were instructed not to "swear in the presence of ladies" but were NOT required to make the no-cursing pledge.
Now, I'm not arguing that any of us should cuss like truck drivers but I'm thinking that we ALL should play by the same rules.
But wait, there's more. The plot thickens. Brother Larry Lavallee, the school's principle, claims that the girls have the dirtiest mouths. So, maybe the pledge DOES make sense.
I may have a solution. Just like Ralphie had to pay his dues for his potty mouth in "Christmas Story," maybe all our moms should track us step for step with a bar of soap and threaten to wash our mouths out with that thing if we get out of line.
An ounce of mom equals a pound of prevention. (photo by tokyobootcamp.com)
Not THAT Big game. I'm talkin' Puppy Bowl! There it was, a spectacle for all dog lovers to see, without all that actual football. Animal Planet's "Puppy Bowl" featured a bunch of puppies doing "something" on a tiny astroturf field. While hedgehog cheerleaders cheered (on loosely defined sidelines) and intrepid hamsters circled overhead in a "Hampster Blimp" and Meep the Bird tweeted throughout the game (Get it...the bird tweeted-Ha!), Sally (a puppy) sped past Simba and Nala (other puppies) as the Puppy Bowl Kiss Cam featured home videos of puppies being kissed by humans.
And when all is said, Marta (pictured), a schnauzer/Beagle mix was named Puppy Bowl MVP as she out-hustled and out-muscled other pups twice her size.
PS. All in all, 63 puppies from shelters all over the U.S. were featured. If you'd like to adopt, may we suggest you go to Petfinder.com.
Woof! (photo from indystar.com)